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And without further ado, the post from Don......
Romance?
Who the F**k has Time for That Now?
By
Michika Salem (http://hiddeninplainsightranch.tumblr.com)
If
Mom and Dad knew I was writing this, they’d kick my ass so hard …
Anyway,
today I was asked to write this entry about relationships. I think my title
speaks for the general attitude around this place … we’re in the middle of a
goddamn war here, who’s got time to hook up when people on all sides of you are
trying to kill you? Though y’know, I’ve found around here at the Ranch that a
lot of us found ways to make relationships work, despite the odds.
I
think we can even go back further than this current crappy situation we’re in
on this. Travel back in time with me, kiddies, while I explore a squicky topic
for a lot of folks: parents dating! (Yuck!)
I
think the best ones to start with are the ones I know best, my own parents. My
dad Cyrus and mom Kitty, now there’s an odd couple if you ever saw one. Dad’s a
nearly immortal wizard, he’s God knows how old, and on a good day he’s just
over two and a half feet tall. Mom was a Navy SEAL, knows her way around more
guns than I can even count, and at one point she was turned into every furry otaku’s wet dream, a cat girl. What do
they have in common?
Plenty.
For
starters they’re both supernaturals, and at least right now that’s the biggest
no-no in the New Empire, punishable by persecution and death. Second, they have
similar personalities. As much as Dad doesn’t want to admit it, he’s got a
temper on him, and sometimes can overreact. Case in point, when his best friend
was killed on a mission, Dad blew the assailant’s head off with a magic spell
that also wrecked half of the room. Mom’s never been shy about her attitude and
her temper; she and her best friend got into a fistfight aboard a submarine
once. On top of that, they’re both career soldiers … at least Mom is, Dad’s
been a soldier so many times in his life he’s lost track … they both play
hellacious chess games, and are really loyal to their friends.
That
was all present, even before they were a couple. They wound up on the same
team, and now they’re married. I think it has to do with their personalities
and their general liking of each other, and not other factors … the fact that
Mom breast-fed Dad back to life once, for instance …
Sorry
… just threw up in my mouth a little bit at that image. Let’s move on.
My
best friend Alanna’s parents, they’re the stars of the story. I think if you
looked up “storybook couple” in the dictionary, you’d see their picture, and
it’s not just because her dad Cole’s a knight and her mom Ariel’s a dragon.
See, you’d think that would create too much friction, and not of the sexy kind.
Knights are always trying to kill dragons, after all, and they were no
different their first time meeting.
Talk
about a misunderstanding. Cole was testing paladin powers he didn’t know about
for the first time, and Ariel was distraught because one of her best friends
was just killed … and it happened to be Cole’s dad.
They
had a couple of arguments, but I think the turning point came when he saved her
life, stopping her from killing herself. Oh I should have mentioned that, she
tended to be suicidal a lot, and he prevented her from dying once. Alanna is
always telling me how her mom talks about her visions, how she knew her dad was
the one she was destined to love, but I personally don’t buy it. I’ve never
been one to take stock in that stuff, after all.
They
went through lots of hell there. They both fought demons, right alongside Mom
and Dad, and sometimes the demons did more damage than anyone should be
expected to handle. Alanna’s dad nearly died once, trying to stop Armageddon.
Literally. Yeah, he got stabbed by a demon knight, but it wound up being
Ariel’s love that helped bring him back from the injury.
Now
we’re at the present, at the New Empire era, and both of those couples, to my
knowledge, are still fairly strong. Mom and Dad bicker from time to time, and
even fight occasionally, but deep down they still love each other. Alanna’s
parents are missing right now, but I think they still loved each other a lot.
There’s
rumblings of sweetness around here now, too. Alanna’s been mooning over a dude
that showed up here about a year ago, big Ojibwa guy by the name of William. (I
call him Willie just because I know it annoys him!) How it’s possible I don’t
know … the government’s trying to kill us every time we turn around, and folks
in general hate all supernaturals’ guts, but somehow those two became a couple.
When they’re together, they’re inseperable. It’s kinda cute in a way, I guess …
Crap,
who am I kidding? Can I tell you something in confidence?
A
short time before Willie showed up, we were joined by an honest-to-God prince,
Fahaian. He’s cute, charming, cultured … really knows how to treat a lady … on
top of that, I think he really likes me …
Uh
oh, Mom’s coming. Sorry to cut this short!
(What?
I wasn’t doing anything, Mom! You can put the rifle away now …)
Michika Salem, her father Cyrus, her
mother Kitty, and family friend William White Bear post from their hiding place
on Tumblr at the Hidden-In-Plain-Sight Ranch
(http://hiddeninplainsightranch.tumblr.com). Follow the most recent exploits of
their ally Alanna Sharpe in Infernal Eighteen, available in paperback and e-book formats at
http://phantomsquadronofficial.weebly.com.
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